Jenny's testimony "Never Alone" on 6/21/2012, 4:06pm...
I was brought up in church. Went every Sunday morning, night and on Wednesdays up until my mother got sick when I was 28. I went because I had to, but I believed Jesus was real. I believed He was real because of my mother and my older sister. And I found myself wanting what they had, the peace that seemed to come from them even though life is crazy. All that pretty much stopped after my brohter and 2 other sisters found out our mother was dying of cancer. We had 3 weeks to say goodbye and during that time our mother continued to be strong in the Lord. Praised His name time and time again. But this meant nothing to me at the time. I just knew my moma was dying and I couldn't do nothing for her.
She died in 2002 and my younger sister and I went wild. Drinking, partying, all the stuff our dear mother tried to keep us from. But during all my wasting of time, I would always have the thought that I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be doing theis or that. I would drown out those thoughts as quickly as I could with whatever alcohol I was drinking at the time. Also my older sister started asking me to church with her and I couldn't really give her an excuse cause I just couldn't. But I would wait til the evening service so I could get over my hangover from the night before. I even went a few times with a hongover, but I went with her. And as I sat in church listening I learned I was a sinner going to a sinners hell. God opened my eyes and let me see what a filthy person I was and that I was spliting hell wide open.
God also sent an Evangelist my way. this man also became a friend over time and God used him to also help me see that I wasn't saved and right with the Lord. One night in July of 2005 the Lord convicted me and brought me to my knees. I cried out to Him to save this wretched soul that is a sinner who needs a Saviour! I thank my Lord Jesus for hearing and answering my cry.
I look back over the years and now can say that I was NEVER ALONE. Not once during all those times when I felt so very alone and scared and useless. God used my mother, my sister, leading me to church and also my Evangelist friend. It has not been easy, sometimes I still get to wanting to drink and I ask the Lord to help with my temptation. It's not all sunny smiles and roses, but I trust my Lord and Saviour to help, to lead and guide me. He is my hope and my life. To Jesus I give all the glory and praise! He saved me and I thank His blessed name! And I contnue to pray that God will open my younger sisters eyes and she will turn to Him soon.