Anonymous's testimony "Healing From Hiv" on 6/18/2016, 3:03am...
After being abused by a pastor at the age of 8, I was a young child with a disturbed mind. I didn't think like the other 8 year olds, I knew something funny had happened to me but didn't really know what it was. Whilst growing up I did not really get along with my parents, was always arguing with them. I did not feel loved, I felt like I was being used by everybody just like my abuser used me.
I loved the attention I got from boys because I did not feel I was getting any attention at home. On my 16th birthday, I went to my motherís church, a new pastor had arrived. I remember walking to the toilet and he walked past me and winked at me. I thought this is very unusual (why would he wink at me?) I ignored it and carried on as normal. After the service, he asked one of the ushers to call me into his office, I went in without any idea of what he wanted to talk about, I was very sceptical if Iím honest.
He said to me ďI want to be your friendĒ I replied, sure of course he is a pastor. I remember him saying he did not want anything sexual. So I said ok but I thought to myself why would he even mention that. I carried on with the conversation as normal, he gave me his number.
One Saturday, I was bored, sitting in my room, staring down from the window on the 19th floor, I needed someone to talk to, about my life, my family but I didnít want to talk to my secondary school friends. So I decided to call this pastor. He was happy to hear from me and asked if he could call me back in the evening.
To cut the long story short, we started having an affair. During this process he got me pregnant, I terminated the pregnancy.
Then on one fine day after school, I decided to go and get a check-up, the results came after about a week. I remember coming back from school with a letter on the table for me from the hospital. I became scared, wondering what the problem could be. I went in to see the doctor. I remember asking him what the problem was, I mentioned different STIs and he said no.
I remember the worried look on his face, he paused and said it was HIV.
My heart literally sinked, I was so confused and upset. When I got home I told the pastor and he didnít seem shocked at all. Infact he wanted us to meet again and carry on with the affair. Now I donít know why alarm bells didnít ring to me at the time regarding this. So we carried on with the affair and he happily lay with me without any protection. I used to remind him ďremember what the doctor saidĒ and heíll say it doesnít matter.
We stopped talking eventually, I changed my number and lost contact. I carried on with my life and education. I did not want to think about what the doctor said, I had dreams and I wanted to accomplish them.
I completed my degree. I had some marks on my body so I decided to go to the doctors to check what it was. The doctor said it was nothing major, but for the first time, she decided to go through my history. Now please note, I had visited doctors previously and none of them ever looked at my history, they listened to why I came and dealt with that particular issue. But this doctor went through my history, I was shocked to say the least.
She contacted the specialist hospital for me and booked an appointment for me. I went him scared, thinking to myself (why did she have to do that) Eventually I said to myself (this could be Godís way of saying to me stop running from the situation) I decided I wouldnít run from the situation but instead Iíll face it because I know God is with me.
Please note I fully gave my life to Christ after the first semester at the university- this doesnít mean I became perfect overnight because I didnít and I am still striving towards perfection (becoming like Christ).
Now back to my story, that day I prayed, cried, bound, loosed everything you can think of. I knew in my heart that this was it, I would not run away more. It would be sorted out once and for all. I started reading healing testimonies online to build up my faith.
To cut the long story short I took the medications from the specialist hospital for 6 weeks, at this point, the side effects were just too much for me, so I stopped. (Please Iím not saying that medications are bad) But for me, I just knew there had to be something else. I carried on praying and believing.
One morning, I woke up crying and praying, asking God to heal me. I saw myself praying with a man on the street. I went out looking for this man ((sounds crazy? I know) I eventually found him, we prayed, he was evangelizing at the time. He gave me one of the leaflets.
After being abused by two pastors, you would think I would hate all pastors right and even the church. But I didnít because I know not all of them are wolves in sheeps clothing.
To cut the story short (because guys this story is long, my life could be a movie LOL) I had a series of dreams, one had a message. This pastor also had a dream around the same time concerning my healing. (myself and this pastor kept in touch, praying together nearly every day concerning my healing). The following Sunday I went to his church, after the service, he told me the dream that he ad and asked me to go and look for the product that he was shown in his dream for me. I told him my dream. We discussed and prayed.
I couldnít find this product, he looked as well and eventually found it. He gave me the website; I was very sceptical but he would always encourage me. So basically I ordered this product, waited a while to get it because it was coming from a village in China. It was an herbal substance (just herbs that were becoming extinct)
I honestly didnít think it would come but this pastor would say to me ďGod does not do scamsĒ. Eventually it came, I ordered a monthís supply. I followed the instructions concerning how to take it. After the month, I went to the doctors to get a check-up. Now guys if anything was wrong, they would contact you within 10 days. I have waited and waited, always checking my phone to see if they would call or even text. Itís been over a month now. I even called and they said that if anything was wrong they would usually text within 10days. It has been over a monthÖ
Can I please add that this is not the full story, I had to cut it short so it doesnít get boring for you to read. I was raped just after this pastor told me about the dream he had. I knew the person that raped me (we went to the same college). I remember him saying to me before and after raping me that God doesnít care and he doesnít know why I bother praying. I remembered telling myself that regardless of what has happened I would not stop trusting and believing in God. And of course I told him to go get help from the hospital (regardless of the fact that I did not consent to him doing what he did to me) because this is what the doctors have told me but I believe I am healed. He said to me, that I was just fooling myself.
Anyway the outcome of this story is that I am healed! God had mercy on me and for me the most beautiful part for me is how God did this. I wanted it to be an instant miracle but he had other plans. During this process he taught me to be patient and to trust completely and solely in Him. God also taught me the art of faith, believing when nothing seems to be happening.
I am not Perfect like Jesus yet BUT God has kept me in this journey, constantly teaching me and moulding me into the woman he wants me to be. The desire to fornicate has gone, he keeps renewing my mind. I write this with tears. I am not that angry, depressed and bitter girl that I used to be. I have joy (unexplainable joy, not because everything is going my way but because I know I have Father that never fails and if I need anything or worried about anything I can go to Him.
He has kept me all these years and will continue to keep me. I thank HIM for his goodness and mercy towards me.
Dear brothers and sisters, keep the faith, ask and believe that you have received what you asked for. It may not come in your own timing but GOD is NEVER late.
Thank you for reading this long story and God bless you. Amen.