Heather's testimony "From Complete Darkness To The Light Of Truth" on 1/16/2018, 11:50am...
Life was empty, I was searching for true purpose, I wanted something deeper, I had felt so lost and confused all of my young life, being raised in a home with "new age" beliefs, I was taught that I am just advancing or learning and when I die I will be re-incarnated as someone else. So there weren't any specific consequences for any actions that I made. Due to those beliefs and having no clear guidance I found myself 15 years old and pregnant. The father had disappeared and I was all alone. I was afraid, hurt and even more confused.
My parents assured me the best and only real logical option was abortion, they were worried about their reputations as well as not being able to afford nor give proper care to a child at that time. After having the abortion, I felt even more dead and empty inside. With so much guilt and pain from my decision, I attempted to end my life as well, after the third time of not succeeding, I turned to drugs, cutting, alcohol and even more painful relationships. I was giving myself to things believing that they would relieve my pain or cure my "emptiness".
Then at the age of 17, I met and had two children with a young man who was also very lost and broken, when I got pregnant this time, I was so thankful to be a parent after what I had done, I wanted to give my best to these children. I then got clean, had my first daughter at the age of 18 and was ready to get my life in order for her to have a good example, although I was still wrapped up in the world's standards of what "Order" looked like. No matter how much I pushed to get things right, they never really were.
I started seeking spiritual guidance but was looking in the same direction I had always known. I left the relationship with the father of my children and it was very painful, we never married, not knowing what damage we were causing. I then moved into another ungodly relationship only to end up pregnant outside of wed-lock once again.
After finding out I was pregnant, the truth came out about who this man really was, everything he had told me about himself including his name and marital status were all lies. He became very verbally abusive as well. I was even more confused, How Did I Get HERE? Why am I really here? How can there be so much evil in people? I started to question everything.
I left that relationship and finally got on my knees asking God this one simple yet The most important question I could ever ask... "God who are you?" Show me your truth, why am I here and why is my life like this?
I then felt an overwhelming presence and sense of shame for all of my past decisions, I began to see them as SIN because that was the truth of what they are. I began to cry to God and ask for his forgiveness. He restored me, gave me a new heart and his word became life as I read it. I was now thirsty for more of him and his ways. I finally found the TRUTH and LIFE and his name is Jesus Christ!
Now I have purpose in Christ. Now I am a redeemed child of God! The veil was torn and my eyes opened, He is a good God and his ways are good! He can change any situation, any heart!
Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. (Matthew 7:7)