Richard, I believe that I wrote to you a few moments ago in a similar vein, but to respond to your question here.
It is true that Paul (then Saul, the Jew, the Pharisee), did commit those heinous crimes of blasphemy, persecution of Christians, & murder. Yet when he turned to the Lord, He found God's Mercy upon him. And we know this was a fact because of his encounter with the Living Christ on Damascus Road & the commission given to him to preach the Gospel to the Gentiles & others.
Then to apply Hebrews 10:26 in the same way would be wrong as we would have to ask, "is it possible for a believer to commit such sins as Saul, the unbeliever, did?" If you feel, "Yes", then I would say that there is no room for repentance & forgiveness. Rather, I believe (& I feel you would agree also) that a Christian cannot sin in that way. And I would add that a true believer cannot live a life of any type of sin: if the Spirit is present, there would be very clear checks about the matter & pleadings towards repentance & restoration. If the Spirit is not in residence, there would be no conviction, indeed, without the Spirit of God, we are not even Christians.
But as I mentioned in my other comment to you on the Hebrew passages: they referenced particularly to the sins of apostasy, when the Jews who had turned to Christ, or those fake 'believers' who shared in the blessings, then turned against Christ & His Gospel to return back to Judaism & the Law, which only led to death. To these, there would be no more place for repentance.
So none of these apply to you: you are saved, you have not committed the sins of Saul, & you have not apostatized. And I don't believe you are in a lifestyle of sin, according the pain in your heart about this matter. You need the assurance from the Word & the Spirit that you are a child of the King & nothing will annul that holy relationship. Keep storing God's Word in your heart & look for that confirmation in your spirit.
It is true that Paul (then Saul, the Jew, the Pharisee), did commit those heinous crimes of blasphemy, persecution of Christians, & murder. Yet when he turned to the Lord, He found God's Mercy upon him. And we know this was a fact because of his encounter with the Living Christ on Damascus Road & the commission given to him to preach the Gospel to the Gentiles & others.
Then to apply Hebrews 10:26 in the same way would be wrong as we would have to ask, "is it possible for a believer to commit such sins as Saul, the unbeliever, did?" If you feel, "Yes", then I would say that there is no room for repentance & forgiveness. Rather, I believe (& I feel you would agree also) that a Christian cannot sin in that way. And I would add that a true believer cannot live a life of any type of sin: if the Spirit is present, there would be very clear checks about the matter & pleadings towards repentance & restoration. If the Spirit is not in residence, there would be no conviction, indeed, without the Spirit of God, we are not even Christians.
But as I mentioned in my other comment to you on the Hebrew passages: they referenced particularly to the sins of apostasy, when the Jews who had turned to Christ, or those fake 'believers' who shared in the blessings, then turned against Christ & His Gospel to return back to Judaism & the Law, which only led to death. To these, there would be no more place for repentance.
So none of these apply to you: you are saved, you have not committed the sins of Saul, & you have not apostatized. And I don't believe you are in a lifestyle of sin, according the pain in your heart about this matter. You need the assurance from the Word & the Spirit that you are a child of the King & nothing will annul that holy relationship. Keep storing God's Word in your heart & look for that confirmation in your spirit.
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