King James Bible
King James Version (KJV)
Testimony: When God Called Me By Name
Holly's testimony "When God Called Me By Name" on 2/13/2014, 8:58am...
My journey to a relationship with God began when I heard him call my name in June 2012. I was raised by Christian parents, but I became disinterested in God as I got older, especially during my teens. My interests lay in all sorts of other things. It wasn’t until my first year of University that I started feeling the impact of not having a personal relationship with God. I became increasingly disillusioned with low confidence and where my life was heading, and hungered for any sort of meaning in life. I’d always felt a sense of emptiness throughout my teens, but I’d become very aware of it during this particular period.
One night as I was researching the supernatural (this included things like ghosts, afterlife theories, telekinesis; I was looking for true meaning in all the wrong places), I was suddenly filled with a fearful awareness that I didn’t know God, and became worried about my eternal destiny. I started to pray, and prayed for a long time. It was the first time I’d prayed to God in such an intimate and heartfelt way, at least since I was a kid. My prayer was riddled with frustration that life seemed meaningless to me, and desperation to know if God was truly real. I remember repeatedly asking him to show me a sign that he exists. It wasn’t a malicious “testing”, but a heartfelt desire to be assured that he’s really there.
After praying, I felt a sense of relief and got into bed. I started reading, and my mind wandered from the prayer. After a short time of reading, I heard a voice say “Holly”. It was a soft voice, but it had a firm, direct tone about it. I froze, and cautiously replied, “Yes, God?”, as if I instinctively knew it was God. I didn’t hear anything else after that though. I was frozen in bed for a while afterwards and couldn’t even bring myself to continue reading. I was shocked at the prospect of God revealing himself like that. I kept thinking over and over, “Did God actually just call my name?” It stunned me. I started doing some research online to see if other people had experienced this. I found that many people had.
I also came across the Bible verse, “I have called you by name; you are mine” (Isaiah 43:1), as well as the verse where Jesus says that he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out (John 10:3). These verses really confirmed the experience for me. God had called me. I felt so privileged and grateful that he had graciously answered my prayer in this way. I’d asked for a sign, and he gave me one. This isn’t the only way he makes himself known to people though. From what I’ve read of others’ testimonies, he makes himself known in different ways to different people, so I figure he knew that calling my name in an audible way was right for me at the time, especially since I yearned for him to show me that he’s real. As it says in the Bible, “If you seek God with all your heart, you will find him” (Jeremiah 29:13).
The experience certainly opened my eyes to his existence and kick-started my interest in him, but I didn’t actually willingly give my life over to him until a few months later. I guess I just had to be led to a place where I was ready to entrust everything to him. I was in a “one foot in and one foot out” situation. When I felt ready to, I joyfully told him that I wanted him to take the reins, forgive me of all the sin in my life, fill me with the Holy Spirit, and make me ‘new’. He answered me straight away. I was instantly filled with a burning passion for him, and my perception started to change dramatically. He was all I could think about, and still is.
For the first time, I had experienced the inner fulfilment and meaning that I’d been so desperate for. It was a real testament of being ‘quenched’ by the “living water” (the Holy Spirit) that Jesus said he would give to all who turn to him. By no means has everything been totally carefree and easy-going for me since I gave my life to him, because we know that there is on-going spiritual warfare within every believer, but I couldn’t imagine my life without God now. Now that my eyes have been opened, a life without God is something I never want to go back to. I’d never been in such a state of joy than when I surrendered my life to him. Knowing him is worth so much more than anything the world has to offer.
To anyone who isn’t sure whether God is real or not - ask him yourself. Talk to him. He’s a conversation away.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you” ~ Jesus (Matthew 7:7)