King James Bible
King James Version (KJV)
Testimony: Blessed And Redeemed
Anonymous testimony "Blessed And Redeemed" on 12/17/2015, 4:28pm...
I was raised by a mother who was 15 when she had me, so....she was addicted to about everything.
DEFACS took me away when i was 5 and gave me to a 'better' family, which pretty much just meant they werent on drugs. Sort of an oversight; they didnt know my adopted mother forced me to stand in the corner from daylight to about 12 everytime i did something she didnt like. My adopted father was military, who believed in push ups from daylight to dark for about a month each time i did something. If i disagreed, i got beat with fists, pans, boards, whatever was closest. I WASNT EVEN A BAD KID. I sat quietly and still got blamed for things the other kids did. This type of harsh punishment lasted until i was 13, when my Growing up, I always heard about the Holy Spirit and how 'Simply believing' would change it all. I heard these things, while watching my parents, who were the kind of people more likely to go to church to point out flaws and gossip, rather than listen. The youth Pastors were my adopted brothers, and they were very Godly men, in my opinion, despite being raised by the same people. I always wondered, why? Why dont they feel scared? Why dont they flitch everytime Mom or Dad raise their hands to them? This abuse led me to believe all parents were angry all the time, even God.
Now, being 18, I've been to chruch and understood that wasnt right.Ellen G. White, the early Seventh-day Adventist leader, wrote:
As the crowning act in the great drama of deception, Satan himself will impersonate Christ. The church has long professed to look to the Saviour's advent as the consummation of her hopes. Now the great deceiver will make it appear that Christ has come. In different parts of the earth, Satan will manifest himself among men as a majestic being of dazzling brightness, resembling the description of the Son of God given by John in the Revelation. (Revelation 1:13-15). The glory that surrounds him is unsurpassed by anything that mortal eyes have yet beheld. The shout of triumph rings out upon the air: "Christ has come! Christ has come!" The people prostrate themselves in adoration before him, while he lifts up his hands and pronounces a blessing upon them, as Christ blessed His disciples when He was upon the earth. His voice is soft and subdued, yet full of melody. In gentle, compassionate tones he presents some of the same gracious, heavenly truths which the Saviour uttered; he heals the diseases of the people, and then, in his assumed character of Christ, he claims to have changed the Sabbath to Sunday, and commands all to hallow the day which he has blessed
Now, Im 18, and Ive felt anger and resentment to my Mom, who is 5 years deceased, and my Dad, who is a 'rainy day' christian. He calls on God when its bad, then forgets God is there.
I felt the fear of God about 3 weeks ago. I was reading the Bible and wondering to myself, {I have a daughter, and shes never treated that way, so what gave them a right to treat me that way?} As much as I hated them, I wondered if I really was a bad person like they made me out to be as a kid, and for the first time in forever, I broke down and cried. I didnt know why I hated them so much because i knew it was wrong. I wanted the peace, the love, the protection, and the forgiveness i never got at home. I looked down, and the Bible, whose cover was wet with tears. Then it hit me, FORGIVENESS. I had long read of Christ's forgiveness and prayed for that level of morality but it was like a mental block or something.
And i realized, through my intense reading and prayer, that NO MATTER HOW GOOD I TRY TO BE, I AM STILL SINFUL, that i wasnt all knowing, wasnt capable of doing it alone. Then I prayed. I asked God to forgive me for my selfishness, and for my failure to trust, to forgive me for all of my hate and evil ways, and let Christ into my life, and the Holy Spirit into my heart.
FINALLY I felt what I'd never had from anyone; pure, unconditional, amazing, inspiring love. I could forgive my parents, my adopted parents, I had peace, and trust, and all these things and feelings of happiness I had never felt before. I knew instantly I was saved. And if God could forgive me, with all my faults, and with all my stubborn pride, then I can trust him.